So desperate to please —
Collecting participation vignettes
To pad a karma resume
Penned in red.

Social comparison,
A viral disease —
Validating, empowering
Assholes and cowards
To justify our exit strategies.
Is it any wonder
This ship is sinking?

A fork in the road,
We chose before, and poorly —
Fear highlights our faults.

Weary drift my worries
From hellfire
To the shadows of
A new formed day.

In the dog house?
We should be so lucky.

Embracing the nuisance
In hopes it subsides —
Situational tinnitus
At the edges of I.

Gardening to weed the pain,
We tend the dream
And love the lie.

Inspiration on an empty mind,
Violence on an empty stomach —
It is nothing that
Some coffee cannot remedy.

Creaking,
Groaning,
Grinding,
Stalling —
Spinning like
A world possessed.

Searching for a green light,
Staring at the sun —
All I see is red.
Looking for a way out
In all familiar places
Where nothing ever changes,
And no one ever leaves —
Expecting naively that fortune,
Unwilling for all,
Is simply
Waiting for me.

Gone off the deep end
For goals intermittent —
Chasing the dream,
Riding runaway trains
Of unguided ambition.

Yeah, you don't like me —
It’s obvious, but that's alright.
Lacking a filter on my words
I probably hit
Too close to the painful truth,
Right?

Foraging through motivations —
Faded, yellowed, half-forgotten,
Trying to find the strength
To carry on.

Sanity dubbed and subbed,
Chanting ethos like a mantra —
Drowning out estranged reason’s
White noised foreign language.

The irony of
Granted time
Consuming precious shelf life —
Dignity a price too steep,
A bridge too far.

Optimism can only
Go so far —
What can you do
When life keeps giving you
Rotten lemons?

The road ahead
Is paved and owned.
Favors only last so long
Without funds,
Without friends,
Without family —
And the toll is steep.

Souvenir vice
And collectable sin —
Don't diss it ‘till you've tried it.
One taste,
And I'll be serving you again.

There's a substantial line
Between sarcasm and assholery,
Which often correlates
With intellect.

Happiness is not a constant,
Nor is it a given.
Swim,
Dive deep,
Ride time's currents,
Grasp those moments
Where you find them —
But remember,
This is not a game of
Win at life.